Frankly, we here at Inspecting Cupid think the “favorites” question is a pain in the ass. It takes forever to fill out, never gives a complete picture of our tastes, and more and more it’s seeming as though everyone’s favorite movie is The Big Lebowski. That being said, user answers to this prompt are often the most fruitful for analysis, so today we’re going to look at what his favorite books say about him.
I sense a pattern here: [Male, 35] “Reading A Game Of Thrones right now, with a few books waiting in the wings after…Dexter series and The Road. I really liked Deliverance and I once bought a copy of White Fang off of a homeless woman. That was a good one. I Am Legend was one of the best sci-fi/horror short stories that I’ve read in years. “
Analysis: So, in other words, this guy only reads books that have been turned into movies or TV shows. Perfect. And let’s put our hands together for his extreme act of charity — paying a homeless woman for a book about a wild animal’s domestication (is that some sort of brilliant metaphor our subject is laying on us, or what?).
That’s the one by JD Golding, right?: [Male, 21] “Catcher in the rye lord of the flies”
Analysis: See what happens when you eschew commas? You end up inventing books that would make every teenage outcast squirm with delight. Who among us would not read a book called “Catcher in the Rye Lord of the Flies”?
Also, there’s something to be said about a college-aged guy whose favorite books are both required reading in most high schools. Unfortunately, that “something” is nothing good.
…if it’ll help me get laid: [Male, 19] “I am into whatever” [Entirety of “favorites” answer]
Wait, the movie or the book?: [Male, 25] “Angels and demons” [Entirety of “favorites” answer]
Funny how? Like I’m a clown? Like I’m here to amuse you?: [Male, 22] “anything funny” [Entirety of “favorites” answer]
First rule of Chuck Palahniuk club is don’t spell his name correctly: [Male, 24] “i love anything written by chuck palinak”
Even my toilet is made from books: [Male, 36] “Most of my apartment is books. I have thousands of them. Thousands of albums too. That’s basically all I have, books, music, and musical instruments. I also have pots & pans. I just cooked scrambled tofu for dinner with roasted broccoli.” [Entirety of “favorites” answer]
Analysis: Though vaguely related to the topic at hand, our subject’s answer shows little discipline, and reveals a personality wrought with stream-of-consciousness tendencies. He’s the kind of guy who converses almost exclusively in parenthetical statements and wonders why, at the end of what he perceives to have been a wonderful date, women don’t want to see him again.
You would totally dig the Declaration of Independence: [Male, 32] “Primary and secondary historical sources. Plus all the main mantastic type novels(Catcher, Wind up Bird Chronicle, Heart of Darkness, anything Carl Sagan)”
Analysis: I just started reading Haruki Murakami, and “mantastic” is one of the absolute last words I’d use to describe his work. “Surrealistic”? Sure. “Nouveau noir”? I suppose. But grouping The Wind-Up Bird Chronicle with Heart of Darkness is a total “which one of these is not like the other?” fail.
More important here, however, is the “historical sources” inclusion. The first date with this guy definitely consists of breaking into the Library of Congress, stealing George Washington’s 1762 almanac, and dramatically reading from it while enjoying a supper of mutton and mead. Bring it on, history boy!